Your stickers are stupid.

So here I am, writing my first ever blog entry. eeeeek.

My sister got me this, my very own website- how cool is that?! Let's just hope I at least get a few readers, even one besides just my parents.  If my dad had his way I'd do comedy open mic nights, and if my mom had her way I'd stop dropping my laundry at her house to do or I'd at least pay the 35 cents her mom used to charge to iron. Hi Mom. Hi Dad.

Okay so here's what. I do not understand those sticker families people put on their cars. I really really  don't get it. It is so tacky and frankly stupid. I cannot imagine spending actual money on such a silly thing. It's almost as practical as paying real money to buy crops for your farm on facebook. Stupid.

Maybe I am just too much of a young, vibrant, cool, adorable, anti minivan driving woman to understand why on earth people do this.  I forced myself to try and get it and think of reasons people may do this. This is what I  got:

-you just want people to know you have kids to get ready in the morning so when you are looking rough, people can see you had to get all those little things ready and didn't have much time for yourself.

-you just want people to know you have kids! and a husband! and they like sports! and you have pets! 

-your sticker books is full. The windows of a car provide plenty of room to collect what you'd like.

That's all i got. Then I thought, why would men have them on their cars?  I assume the wife got them and made sure they went on. 

Reasons for that:

-to make it known that he is married and has kids and keep away? yes, good idea because that bratty kid screaming with snots running all over his face climbing out of your husbands truck is such a turn on.                                                                                  

-in the event the kids aren't with him, the stickers will definitely ward off any other woman, and if the kid stickers aren't enough the pets are on there. I'd imagine the conversation would go like this:

"Girl, I would totally hit on him, he has kids and whatever but he has a fish- a fish! I can't, i..I  just can't."

[A little side note about the fish sticker. Let's be real. That fish takes one damn ride. Home. Their next ride is down the crapper. Smart, you just wasted $4.75. For another $4.75 you can replace it with a sticker of a dead fish upside down. That's not a joke. That really is an option.]

-to let it known that they do, in fact, have their husbands balls in their handbag on the front seat of their mini van which is also detailed with family stickers.

If you read this, have those stickers and are offended, just know I too am offended. It takes everything in me not to rearrange those stickers into something obscene.